Warning!
This post is not for the faint of heart. It will contain too many details about two stroke engine maintenance and bore the soul out of you, your neighbour, and your neighbour's dog. Unless if you're Xuanyou, who far outweighs me in being a gigantic nerd. Legend has it that a young and naive bridesmaid once was baited into asking him about
turbochargers and was scarred for life thereon. She might still be trussed up in a strait jacket somewhere, mumbling incoherently to herself.
No...no more...no! Xuanyou (thank you for your kind donation!) was next seen talking to another female member of the wedding party about server maintenance. Well, Xuanyou, this is for you.
ALL THE OUTSIDE STUFF
Catbus the Tuktuk!
Catbus the Tuktuk was manufactured by Bajaj Auto probably 7 odd years ago. It weighs in at 307kg, is about 1.5 grown men's heights long, a toddler wide, and about my height. Catbus is largely yellow with bits of brown and red. It looks like a Tuktuk pretending to be a cat pretending to be a bus.
Catbus is happy after good wash
It features a single seat up front in the cockpit, and the rear bench seats seat either two moderately sized rickshaw runners in relative discomfort or one fully grown nerd.
Wenwen the Washerwoman loves Catbus cleaning
You can't quite see the rear seat here but it's not really all that big. It also falls off, unveiling a whole bunch of gross stuff. Wenwen the Washerwoman had to clean it all off (thank you, my love!)
Crud on
Crud off feat. pail of destiny
Fog lights
Single headlamp on the tyre cowling
The front features a cat smiling and a cute red nose. The headlamp puts out a little cone of light that sputters away, threatening to rage quit any time your engine revs dip any wee bit. The front fogs are pretty adorbs but puts out no more illumination than a dying matchstick. We were staring at the filament slowly heat up then turn moderately red-ish...and that was that. A bit anticlimactic.
Right side panel
The side has our names painted boldly on in case we crash out through some freak accident and are horribly maimed beyond identification. The Totoro serves no identification purpose whatsoever but is cute so it's there. All these were painted on by hand by this very talented local Tuktuk-painter.
Wenwen posing with very talented local Tuktuk-painter while Chief Mechanic buries his head and hands into Catbus' entrails. Yes, through the bum hole if you'll have it.
Left side panel
Catbus' bumbum
The rear is where the engine access hatch is, behind the painted on little tail. The hatch is most securely fastened by the use of two plus sized bolts with a nut screwed on at the end to kiap the whole damn thing in place.
TOO MANY DAMN PICTURES OF A DIRTY 2 STROKE ENGINE
Catbus' heart is a 145.45cc two stroke petrol engine that's shoved in the back, and powers the two back wheels. That's right, all you nerds out there, this baby is rear engined and rear wheel drive. Whoa! It runs about 25km/litre or so, we hear. We haven't had a chance to test that but I'm sure we'll soon find out if thats true. The tank is some 8L big so that should give us a range of 200km a pop.
The engine is no more complex than that of a lawnmower's and runs on just a single, bone jarring, cylinder. This also makes for easy maintenance.
The single cylinder head is dead centre and the carburettor is the thing to the right that looks like it's got too many hoses running out of it
Luckily for us we had time for some instruction and to give our baby a bit of a once over. Grease monkey time.
Fuel on/off switch
We spent a few minutes trying to figure out why the vehicle wouldn't start just to realise that the fuel switch was turned off. Doh.
Fuel filter
A new fuel filter because the old one looked like it had survived the great flood and then some. Also because it's 30 Singapore cents.
Air intake hose
It was a bit loose and the clasp wasn't quite screwed in so we tightened everything nicely for good measure. Always good to not have random bits falling off your engine.
Sweet
Exploded view of the carburettor
Trying to get the stupid thing off despite the stripped out Philips screws holding it together
Throttle seems ok but needed a bit of lube as it was sticking
Spark plug (singular) doesn't look terrible but we got a spare for the road anyway
Red thing is the CDI and controls ignition timing. It's dusty and grungy.
This is a spider that has decide to make the engine bay its home. It lives no more.
Choke valve
PLEASE! NO MORE!
Good job for making it this far! Now you can blink out of your daze and see how Catbus gets about.
Not infrequently, the power output of the engine drops from 7 horsepowers to 1 slipper-clad-man-power
Steering unit
It's really an underpowered cheapie motorcycle with a cage welded around it, so it steers like one. On the right side you have the controls including the all-important thing that goes BEEPBEEPBEEP that Indian drivers communicate with (except if you're a container truck, which goes BLARGHHHHHHHH). It's like morse code except louder. The message communicated varies from a "thank you" to "after you" to "me first!" to the aural equivalent of a great vehicular middle finger. The right hand grasps the throttle which sticks occasionally, and is also physically sticky with the grime and residue of many men who have come, driven, and left their grime and residue behind.
The gear change is the left grip (Vespa users would be familiar with this) and the clutch handle in the usual place on the left too. Changing gears feels like wrestling with a bear and I've the blisters to prove it.
Brake pedal!
The brake pedal is beside the right foot. Not under, but beside. To brake, one has to lift his right leg like a dog looking to take a quiet leak, knee the throttle control and his right hand by mistake, swear loudly, then descend upon the pedal with the wrath and fury of Nordic gods. It's a good old drum brake and I hope it doesn't kill us one day in a mess of tangled limbs.
Spare fuel reservoir
Every vehicle worth its salt is able to communicate to you that it's out of fuel and needs to be fed more petroleum goodness to continue purring on. Catbus the Tuktuk is able to do that too, most likely by suddenly stalling in the middle of a junction, in a blaze of angry horn sounds. Being crafty human beings and most unfond of being the target of angry horn sounds, we've grafted on a spare fuel reservoir onto our Tuktuk. It's a jerry can tied on with rope. More to come.
Spare tyre bay
The spare tyre is chucked underneath the driver's seat. Above green device is the battery which is residing in its normal position, also beside the right foot. Far off in the distance is the handcrank starter. Depending on on your zodiac sign, how the stars are aligned at that exact moment and whether your fengshui has had a recent boost, it may either bring your engine to a roar (yes!) or jolt you around on the spot with a mild ache in your left bicep.
Tinkeringhao
Now you know more about tuktuks than you would ever want to know. Catbus has gotten a mild service and seems good for the road, save for the clunky gears, dim fog lights, and a reverse gear that isn't.
We'll soon be on the road and fingers crossed for Catbus surviving our long trip! We're all super proud of how it's turned out and can't wait to get started.
See you guys around!
Yinghao
